What if my son is suddenly afraid to go to his Dad's? not a requirement. Best Way to Sell an Engagement Ring after Divorce. I would encourage you to seek the help of a therapist if you can't make any progress. They don't get along at all and fight with each other constantly. If someone gets a promotion, moves, or remarries, custody and … I wish you both the best of luck. If you are. First, let me tell you, I am NOT a lawyer and I cannot give you legal advice. To have grounds to change visitation you've got to have some real facts and solid incidents that show he is putting her in bad situations. Can I choose if I want to go to his house on the weekends or can he force me? dad can stop ulitizing his visitation for 5 years and decide to start back up. No one is going to suggest you have to force him to go at gunpoint. This leaves them wondering about the reasons for their resistance and what they can do about it. Once issued, a visitation order must be followed by both parents. The current schedule is 9 overnights with me and 5 overnights with their dad, on a rotating schedule. Janet's Question: My 2 daughters are 9 & 12. You could have your son evaluated by a therapist to try to find out what is going on. Depending on her age, try to find out what her objection is. I have to represent myself because I haven't found a lawyer who has time for our case. Depending on what the therapist says custody may need to be adjusted. If you’re facing this situation, keep reading to learn what your options are. By the time a youth is 17 years old, they are on the cusp of young adulthood and nearing the day where they will gain certain … However, it can be difficult to make visits happen if a 17 year-old is refusing to show up for visitation. The decision is never completely up to the child. Asking for some visitation and counseling is an excellent idea. As between the parents, there shall be no presumption or infere… Judges usually are more sympathetic in situations involving teenagers where the child can exercise some control. Mary's Question: I have been divorced for 4 years. I only want to see my son. I did not go to court because I was afraid my son and his father would get even angrier and I would see him even less, but I am faced with the reality that I may not be able to see him anyway. This refusal may result from alienation, anger, and sometimes fear. It also sounds like the exchanges are filled with tension and this could be making your son upset, or more upset. Domestic Violence . B. When a child is sick or otherwise unable to make a visit, the parent with present custody of the child must notify the other parent as soon as possible and work out a make-up visit. My 14 year old triplet boys refuse to meet him and spend time with us as a couple. In some states, the information on this website may be considered a lawyer referral service. There is specific case law regarding this issue in which the … He drinks and keeps his house unclean. If you have additional questions about visitation after reading this article, contact a local family law attorney for advice. If you have concerns that your child is being abused or harmed by the other parent, then you should contact your attorney immediately. (My ex has said he'd take me to court on contempt charges). Their mother has primary custody – yet I have had our daughters 95% of the time since March 2020. In the majority of states including Ohio teens under the age of 18 cannot legally make the decision themselves whether or not to see their parents. It depends on that particular child's ability. Custody and visitation are always modifiable when there has been a material change in circumstances. Are they allowed to make that decision? Typically, the age of majority is 18. My kids visit thier mom 2 nights a week 5pm to 9pm and Sat 9am to Sun 9am. ~Brette~. Many clients ask me whether there is an age can a child have to be to refuse visitation. My son is very upset because he may be eliminated from the team if he continues to miss games/practices. Custodial parents face a difficult issue when a minor child refuses to visit with the other parent. Is he encouraging them to go? Okay.. i tell him to get in the car. Understanding some of the development of teenagers from 13 to 18 can help you make a better parenting plan and custody schedule for your teen. Your use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Use, Supplemental Terms, Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy. However, once they become teens, it is harder to force them to go. All rights reserved. Father looking for some guidance here. Before the year 2000, the Court considered what's best for the child. Children do not get to decide about visitation. Whether you’ve divorced or you’re legally separated, if you’re a parent you need a custody order. Thank you for this question. he refuses. Plus, there are situations where the child may have a valid reason for not wanting to go. In a sole physical custody arrangement, the child lives with one parent full-time, even if the non-custodial parent has visitation rights or shares in the legal custody arrangement. If Your TeenAger Refuses Visitation With Their Dad When Children of Divorce Become Teens Whether you are a divorced parent or not, here is the reality of raising children, the older they become, the less interested they are in spending time with you. Brette's Answer: No court is going to force a 17 year old to go on visitation if he doesn't want to. My 14 year old daughter does not want to visit with her father. I've often found that teens aren't aware that there are options and they simply see the situation as take it or leave it and reject it out of hand. If it's at all possible try to sit down with him in a neutral, no-conflict way and share your concerns. Once he becomes an adult, he can refuse contact with either of his parents, or both. Domestic Violence . What is my responsibility in trying to force him to go? I worked with many families who were in similar situations to yours and I know how difficult and frustrating it is for you. Jill writes: Please give me some help and advice. Bernadette's Question: The father of my 17 1/2 yr. old daughter has never had any type of contact with her. The situation is increasingly … Instead of going to stay at his dad's house, what if he just had dinner with him or went to a sporting event one night a week or once every two weeks? 17 is a tough age. My son wants to see his dad but there are times he doesn't want to go from Friday-Monday. Can they arrest me if my child refuses visitation? Her mother wants custody and or visitation. She has been under professional counseling for several years as well and dr’s state it is not in the childs best interest to force visitation… One of the most common issues that youth contact NRS about are family dynamics and conflict with the family rules. From 13 to 18 years old, teenagers develop a sense of personal identity within the rules and regulations of society, school, and friends. Our daughter was already in counseling at the time, but the counselor has refused to write a letter or appear in court over fears of being sued by my ex. You may refuse visitation to a parent who has been accused of domestic violence. Thank you for this question. This is the fourth post in my series on child custody issues which San Diego parents face during the summer months. Once he becomes an adult, he can refuse … The fact is that you can't change who he is and neither can your daughter. However, I have encouraged him to go anyway. Suz's Question: My son is 5 and has been going with his dad since he was 1. You might try talking to your son about changing the schedule. Each state has different case law that indicates what kind of influence the child can have on the decision at various age ranges. Otherwise, he will take me to court. At 9 and 12, they are old enough to express an opinion, but their opinion is not going to be decisive. It's not really up to you - she's old enough that her opinion will be what the court listens to. I have 3 daughters (11 – 13 – 15). It lays out the single overriding concern for every aspectof parenting time: Best interests of the child Under § 20-124.3(8), the court recognizes “the reasonable preference of the child, if the court deems the child to be of reasonabl… I would also suggest you talk to the coach and explain the situation. What to consider if you are thinking about doing your own divorce. Your child’s refusal to attend visits with your ex could land you in hot water. Child’s Preference. The request in and of itself is not going to be enough. Now that being said, I completely understand your worries about what is happening at his house. If parents aren’t able to agree, a judge will make a visitation and custody order based on the child’s best interests.. However, you could be found in contempt of the court order if you aren’t able to make your child available for visitation. Ask that a guardian ad litem be appointed to represent the children and their point of view so that the court can be made aware of why they don't want to go on visitation. Furthermore, it is not much of a parent who would go to court to try to force a 16 year old to see them if the child refuses to do so. Anytime children refuse to participate in a planned visit with their other parent, you should: Talk with … If parents aren’t able to agree, a judge will make a visitation and custody order based on the child’s best interests.. Brette's Answer: If you do not send your children on visitation, it is considered custodial interference which can be the grounds for a change in custody. The child can choose not to visit, but that decision is still subject to judicial review. He may also be having a typical teenage clash with his dad about rules or responsibilities. Under South Carolina’s family laws, there is no set age at which a child can refuse to go visit with the other parent. he has an order that says he can. I have been seeing a man for 18 months now and we are planning on getting married. Child support and visitation are two separate things, What to do when your child resists visitation. under 16, and; unable to have a parent or guardian present, you can ask your parent or guardian to tell the judge they think you are mature. What if my child doesn't want to visit her abusive father? (R.R. Can my teens refuse to spend time with my fiancé and me? You need to discuss in detail what your concerns are with specific incidents. He's likely to get nowhere. Most … One of the most common issues that youth contact NRS about are family dynamics and conflict with the family rules.By the time a youth is 17 years old, they are on the cusp of young … Courts must further the best interests of the child in determining an appropriate custody arrangement in Kentucky. Specifically, you could ask your child’s other parent to call the child on the phone or come over to your house and try to speak with the child who is refusing visits. Im NOT going to stand out there in the middle of a public place for hours and hours. We currently have shared custody and he is threatening to file for 50-50 custody. My 9 year old son is expressing a lot of dissatisfaction about having to miss out on his key events to visit his father. It sounds to me like you're doing all the rights things. The attorney listings on this site are paid attorney advertising. 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